normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize
