So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
