shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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