Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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