I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
