Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Randomize
