new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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