Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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