One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
