The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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