I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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