Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize
