just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
