she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
