If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
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