yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
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