So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Randomize
