I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
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