Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Randomize
