im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
