I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
