Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
You took a bar mat shot.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Randomize