Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
