I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
