He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
