problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
