Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
