Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
