i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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