I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
