I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
