it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize
