im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
