Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
