just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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