I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
