I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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