OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Randomize
