i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize