Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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