I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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