help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
