I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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