I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
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