I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
