Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(716): View more from New York

I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me

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(513): View more from Ohio

Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.

(1-513): View more from Ohio

Not having phil's child is good enough.

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(+64): View more from New Zealand

The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.

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(805): View more from California

Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.

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(204): View more from Manitoba

Glow parties are what I live for

(1-204): View more from Manitoba

Your priorities in life astound me

Fav 1 2036 844
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.

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(225): View more from Louisiana

All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.

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(540): View more from Virginia

This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?

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