I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
