belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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