In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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