Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Randomize
