So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize