the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Randomize
